dearest little muffin,
8 months ago today you drew your first breath.
i was finally able to hold you.
see what you looked like.
introduce you to your sisters.
tell you a million times over, "i love you."
stare at you while you slept.
watch your amazing, proud daddy hold you.
you are a joy.
it seems strange in so many ways that you have not been with us longer.
you just "fit".
and i am so glad you are a part of our family.
i am so glad you are a girlie.
one of "the sisters".
seeing your older 3 sissies draw you into their little club is precious.
a highlight of my days is seeing their relationships with you develop.
you are so loved.
dearest baby, something went wrong inside momma the day you breathed your first.
and it has been a very hard, dark journey these 8 months.
this past week being especially difficult.
but i'd walk this path time & time again.
you are my daughter and i love you.
you are worth it.
and this is not your fault.
so if you ever read this...
know these things.
you are a gift.
and i am so very glad God chose to make you ours.
ps - mommas out there, if you wouldn't walk this road again. if you wish you were not a momma - you are not a horrible person. not even close. ppd is brutal. brutal. brutal. don't you ever think, precious momma, that you are less of a momma for how you are feeling. just wanted to add that in. no condemnation to you in this. xo